I think it is only fair that you get to know me a little bit better to understand how I think and how my brain works in order to put my writings into perspective and to draw your own conclusions. This is why I, once about every ten days, answer one of the questions from the New York Times question series: 36 Questions – How to fall in love.
If you want to start at the very beginning, you can find question 1 here.
And if you just missed the last answer to question 35, you can find it here.
Question #36 reads as follows:
“Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.”
Hello there =), in this instance you are my partner. Of course, if you don’t want to you don’t need to write anything as an advice. Nevertheless, in case you do, I will be grateful.
Still the biggest “problem” I struggle with at the moment is how to continue dealing with my wounded heart. I think that I am on a pretty good way. I don’t write my ex-girlfriend since a couple of weeks and I have less days during which I’d like to write her again. I even created a profile on a dating platform and I would be open to meet someone new. That is something I was not really open to 3 months ago.
Still, I have days during which I wish that she reaches out to me. Moreover, there are a few things happening in my life and she is still the first person I’d like to talk to about it. I know that this might just be die to the fact that I am used to talk to her first or that I miss the conversation with a partner, as this is still something different.
I think and that is also how it feels, that I am on a good way. Now, I just don’t know how best to proceed. To give myself time to process everything and get more distance? Actively looking for someone new? Not looking for someone new at all until I don’t think about my ex anymore? Or are there other options I just don’t see?
My approach is to not actively seek a new relationship right now. I think this time alone is also beneficial despite feeling lonely at times. If I’d have a date, I would go of course. I am open for someone new, but just not desperately looking for someone to fill that hole. I am okay with that process and my approach so far. However, if you have an advice I will always listen and consider a good proposition =).
Take care, Stephan