Is Happiness an inside job?

You might have read it somewhere as an inspirational quote: Happiness is an inside job. But is it though?

The easy answer is a yes. I think that we are the creators of our own happiness and equally for our own unhappiness. There is evidence that our happiness-level is only partially limited by our genes. This means we can and we need to generate our own happiness.

I think by reflecting and being honest and kind with ourselves, we can identify the areas in which we are unhappy. This can help us to come up with actions to improve our well-being. What makes us happy and what we need is within us and therefore the answers can only lie within us, too.

Though, there are some hints that we need external help at times. For example, one element of a happy life is influenced by our relationships. Especially our friends. I wrote an article about the importance of finding our offensive line and it shows how much social connections can do for our well-being. This is obviously an external factor and therefore I’d say that, at least partially, our happiness depends also on others. Okay, in the end you choose your friends, so it is okay to debate about that =). Some people say that we basically are nothing but energy and therefore we are always connected to other people, because we form one universe. I think there might be something to it. Moreover, in Buddhism they also speak about the interconnectedness of all things and beings.

Sometimes, if we feel down, we crave for someone to be there for us. Maybe to hold us in his/her arms or maybe just to spend time with us. Sure, this can point towards a need and something we could work on internally. But still, at this moment, someone else would help us to feel better.

So, what role do these small things play that others can do for us or that we can do for us? Maybe we need some small wins or rewards from time to time to be able to keep going. This might give us enough strength to work on our long-term happiness.

What do you think?

 

Stephan

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