Maybe two weeks ago I stumbled upon an article in my constant pursuit to better understand depression. In this article, I read something for the first time that struck a nerve. It mentioned that one part in the whole mental health dilemma could be our generation’s fear of the future.
That felt very close to me. In general, I am an optimistic person. When there is a problem at work, I know I can fix it. When others have a problem, I can clearly see the positive outcome. But when it comes to thinking about my future, I get anxious.
I am single and one of the fears is that I remain single for the rest of my life. This thought scares me. This is amplified by the fact that I still think about my ex-girlfriend from time to time and that I am hesitant to look for someone else. The other thing is that I ask myself a lot of questions about what I want to do for a living. Then, I don’t know how to do it and if there is a market for it etc. The problem is that there are so many big and small questions and they all mix together leaving me confused and anxious, because with it comes the question where to start?
This is paralyzing at times and then nothing happens. Which in turn, only intensifies the fear of the future. So, what to do about it? That is not a rhetorical question =). If you have an answer to that, please let me know. I know we all have one piece of the puzzle and we need to come together to fit them all together.
What I think can help is to practice mindfulness and optimism. I already saw the effects. Just the last three days were a bit difficult again. I think this is still part of the process. What I won’t do is quit. I will keep on going and doing these exercises. Maybe what could also help is to train patience (I hope this will also be a side effect of y mindfulness practice). Moreover, maybe I should do this one exercise again where I shed light on my deepest fears by asking myself the question what would be the worst thing that can happen. I would paint a very gruesome and detailed picture. The benefit? Then I know what I am dealing with and the horror might disappear. Often, it is just the fear of the unknown and fear of uncertainty.
I will keep you updated =)