How to transform?

If I want to grow and develop myself, I need to accept and embrace change. Change means that something has to die in order to make room for something else. Death is not a nice thing to think about it and we are often reluctant to accept changes. It is often even harder when it comes to changing ourselves. So how can I do this? How can I transform?

One of the sentences I don’t like to hear when I meet an old acquaintance is: You didn’t change at all. Even when it is meant positively. Of course, they often see you in a certain way and are wired to see these expectations fulfilled. But it might also indicate that there is really no change. At least not in a profound way.

My goal is to constantly learn and develop myself, but knowing what to do and actually doing it are different things. To change things in myself, I need to first have a strong motivation for the desired state and then I must be able to let go of the current state. I must accept that behaviors, habits, actions, and beliefs need to go (need to die). It also means to be honest to myself, but not judgmental.

As change doesn’t happen overnight, it might be the case to feel uncertain and/or uncomfortable. Maybe I was so used to think in a certain way or doing things in a certain way and now I have to change it? That is a complicated endeavor. If I don’t see the benefits of this, I set myself up to fail and to return to my old beliefs or behaviors. It is also good to come up with and establish a habit.

It can be a painful process. But what is more painful? Knowing that a change will improve my life and not acting? Which also means living with this knowledge and maybe even regret for the rest of my life, which is also painful. Or taking action, suffering maybe a bit more, but seeing the silver lining? Of course, there is no certainty to the success of a change process. It is jumping into the unknown. You might say: the devil you know is better than the devil you don’t. It means that transformation is a risk. But is bears great rewards, too. It can help me to get closer to the person I can be. I think that this is part of the mission of life. To become or get close to your optimal self. The good thing is that I can decide that and you can decide that for yourself, too. So, let us aim high and embrace change.

Have a wonderful day and take care!

Stephan

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