A few days ago, I logged into Facebook again. I don’t use it really and maybe every 3-4 weeks I just check it for a few minutes. That day it so happened that I saw a picture with a quote along the lines like “self-love is not candles and a hot bath, but a life you don’t want to escape from”. As I don’t want to swallow any quote that gets shared or reads nice, I took some time to reflect about it.
In general, I agree with the core of this statement, I also think that self-love goes deeper than superficial things which aim at making us feel better. Nevertheless, I also see their merits.
As always, it depends on the circumstances. A life you don’t want to escape from sounds like a very nice goal and is ultimately a life in which you show yourself the love you need and deserve, as otherwise there would still be something missing and you still would like to escape from it (or a part of it).
But what if the main hurdle or opponent to get there is yourself? What if you are a person who constantly works too much, is too critical with himself/herself? What if that person runs itself to exhaustion only to achieve a distant goal? All of those things don’t show that you really love yourself. Even if you work so hard to achieve a life you don’t want to escape from. Who guarantees that you will stop or change once you arrived at your destination? If you cannot love yourself and take care of yourself now, why would it be different then?
So, maybe having a break and getting a massage or something like that can be a good step towards self-love. To show yourself the care you would show others. And it is not either or. I think there always has to be a good balance. In essence, the quote is good, but it always depends on the situation and there is no harm in giving yourself a break and doing something “superficial” that helps you to feel good =).
Have a wonderful day and take care!