Change can be scary. But it is often not the change itself, but the uncertainty that comes along with it. How can I do this? Where do I find that? When will I get there? And so on and so on. It is like standing in front of a huge mountain. You have heard that the land behind has plenty of nice things, but you also don’t know for certain. You also don’t know if you will ever make it over the mountain in the first place. Instead of being pulled by the promises of the new and “holy” land, we are pushed back by our fears.
I like to give examples, so I want to share another one from my life. Applying for a job can be such a scary change. Even if I am not 100% satisfied by my job, it is still not easy to just change and find another one. And I can understand people who stay in their jobs although not being happy. The devil you know is better than the devil you don’t. I can understand, but I don’t like it. So, I lace my shoes and prepare myself for the climb.
Standing in front of my mountain I directly see the dangers. I won’t find another job. I won’t find a job in the city I’d like to live in. I will end up depressed and broken. Not very optimistic, I know. But that is not my true self, but rather my brain reacting to uncertainty. If I know that, I can be gentler with myself and, in turn, I can be more optimistic. Of course, it is difficult to find THE job (if this even exists) during the first hours or even days and weeks of searching. And I mean I should be optimistic. Until now, I managed not to become homeless =) I should draw energy from my past and the successes I had. They help me to keep on going.
And what happens when I start climbing? Of course, as un unexperienced mountaineer (in this context someone who is looking for a new job) I might fall in the beginning. Being overwhelmed by all those job listings and portals and job descriptions it is normal to struggle and wondering why I started climbing in the first place. I also think that many wonderful jobs have a difficult time being found. So, the right path can be hidden or foggy.
Another scary thought can be that you are in it alone. Only you know what you want and sometimes you cannot even really pin point it and explain it to others. That is also quite normal in the beginning. But, you decide if you want to be in it alone. If you let other people know what you are looking for or you ask other people for help, you might find yourself some wonderful companion(s) on your way.
The more I climb, the more secure I feel. Even if it takes weeks, after I browsed through many portals and ready countless job descriptions, I get a better feel what is possible and where I could apply. The mountain looks not so intimidating anymore. In educating myself, I reduce the uncertainty, the unknown that was looming over me in the beginning of my journey. It is the same with studying for an exam. At the beginning, I didn’t have a clue how I could possibly learn all that knowledge. But, the more I studied and the better I knew the content, the easier it got for me to feel safe and confident. I think that is also a trait many introverts share. That is also why they (or we) are at a disadvantage when it comes to studying for exams. But more on that in a different post.
Of course, there are other questions, such as will the company I applied for hire me? In the beginning, that shouldn’t be my concern. To overcome my fears, I need to increase my knowledge to deal with uncertainty. The goal is to collect a sufficient amount of job offerings that are interesting enough for me to apply. This will help me to tackle the next challenge. In the context of mountaineering this would be the descent.
To be continued…. =)
Have a wonderful day and take care!