After two months and more than 60 entries, I want to reflect about what I experienced writing the blog.
Writing one entry a day shows me once again how quickly time passes. Writing those words, I feel as if it has been yesterday that I wrote my first few lines. It is definitely an adventure. But it is not always easy. At times, I feel as if I live for my blog. Every interaction and every experience are scanned for potential topics, I can write about. I see the danger of becoming inauthentic. As I don’t get much feedback on what I write, this feeling is reinforced. Maybe being aware of that danger is enough to avoid falling in that trap. However, I also want to ask you to tell me, if you get this feeling.
But it also has its benefits. I am more present in my day-to-day interactions and I am also more in touch with my feelings and thoughts. Furthermore, it awakens my curiosity. I mean, I have a long list of topics I want to write about and there are quite a few people left I want to interview. It is also a reminder of my past. All the good and all the bad things that happened are more present than before. However, I don’t know if that is because of the blog or because of me yearning for some things I had and lost.
Though, a long list isn’t a guarantee that I know what I am going to write about each day. Sometimes after work, I am sitting in front of my laptop, looking on the list I made, and I don’t want to write about any of those topics. I think that, if I don’t feel like writing about a particular topic, I don’t do it justice writing about it. I always want to write from my heart. I feel that it is so much easier for me to write when I feel that passion rising inside of me. Maybe, sometimes I should wait a bit longer and let my emotions settle a bit before approaching this topic. On the other hand, would this be contrary to my own reason why I started the blog. To process my feelings and to create clarity. I think it is always the goal to find a good balance.
It is still a long way ahead. I have no idea where it will lead me, but I don’t want to miss this part of my day, when I sit down and let my mind take over. A mind fueled by my heart. I am still deeply grateful for every individual who takes the time to read the blog.
A big and warm thank you!
Have a wonderful day and take care =)