Interview: A life full of small steps

A couple of days ago, I managed to conduct the second interview with another very interesting person. This time I interviewed a dear friend of mine whose thoughts and approach to life are inspirational for me.

Please meet Sina. Sina is 27 and currently lives and works in Switzerland. I first met her on a conference back in 2014, where she was heading the organization committee for an international leadership conference for about 150+ participants. However, only one year later, when we were both trainer on the same conference we bonded on a deeper level.  Since then, we stay in contact and every conversation with her is wonderful and inspiring.

But what makes Sina so inspirational?

During our interview, she told me that she doesn’t have a straight life path. She also didn’t really know what she wanted to do. However, she thought she has to have a clear life path with everything planned. She felt she had to know every single step, because other people expect it from her. However, instead of giving in to those expectations, she chose a different approach. She actually stopped looking too far into the future, but was instead interested only in her next step. That is how one experiences was connected to another one and which led to what she is doing today. But more on that later.

In order to deal with expectations, she just stopped telling other people about her next step. She shifted her energy from talking about it to actually doing it. She told me that she tried out many different things and jobs to figure out what she enjoys doing. I also tried to figure out what started this process and it might have something to do with a major setback. When her stepdad died, she realized how fast life can be over. As a result, she spent a whole year only doing things what she likes. She realized that what she loves doing is to connect people and help them become happier. In addition, she also wants to have awesome experiences. During this time, she organized conferences about self-development, where she met Kai with whom she is currently working. Those experiences also led her to go to Africa for a while. She also realized that she enjoys giving workshops and facilitation. Actually, she told me that every job she performed, be it working as a waitress or even as a hostess, led her back to the things she enjoys.

Such a lifestyle also has its downsides. It has a lot of uncertainty in it. This can be quite scary. That is why, I as interested in how she deals with that. I also know that she thinks a lot and has ups and downs. She told me that she tries to listen to her heart and her intuition over her brain. For her, it is a good way to handle the risk and the anxiety that come along with her approach to life. Moreover, she said that her curiosity is bigger and therefore more powerful than her fears. She values time a lot and she doesn’t want to waste it. However, this doesn’t mean she always has to be efficient and performing. It can also mean that she watches a movie or spends time with family and friends. What she does is to be mindful and be fully present with her friends and family. Another important aspect of her approach to life is her relationship with money. For her, money comes and goes, but time doesn’t.

Another point from which you can see her mindful approach to life is when she told me that for her stress and anxiety are not “produced” by external factors, but come from within. It is our thoughts about situations and behaviors that causes stress. Everything stems from within and knowing that everything will disappear again helps her a lot. Knowing that she creates the emotion or feeling helps her to not to feel captive by her thoughts.

What also helped her was to get rid of old dogmas. One dogma she had was that she was certain she cannot speak in front of groups. In order to get rid of this dogma, she applied a playful approach to challenge this belief. She let her curiosity take over and engaged in different situations where she had to speak in front of groups. Eventually, this helped her to see that her dogma is wrong. Now, she actually enjoys speaking in front of groups.

Sina is also picky with whom she surrounds herself with. She wants to have the feeling that she can be her true self without having to “fight” for their acceptance. Those people are also often the ones she can and want to learn from. In general, Sina is curious about other people and you feel that when you get the chance to speak with her.

But Sina has still some things she is struggling with. One of those things is that it is difficult for her to enjoy success. She is very demanding of herself. That is also why we spoke about her biggest success and also her biggest learning. As her biggest success, she sees that she was able to stop please other people, because she thought she had to do it in order to get love. Since then, she feels free and more creative. This helps her to be able to help other people in a better and more natural way. Pleasing other people had let her to lose herself.

Her biggest learning comes from a time when she was very busy. During this time, she felt she had to prove something to herself. That she is good enough and has to work a lot. However, after a while she felt a disconnect with life. She remembered how important family and friends are to her and to spend quality time with them. We spoke a bit more about failures and she put it quite nicely.  Your life is like a car you drive on the road of life. In order to keep on driving along the road you need to refuel. The gas are our failures. We need those failures in order to get further in our lives.

I asked Sina, if she had one thing she wants to tell other people and this is what she told me: Let go of thoughts that hold you back and try out everything you want to try out.

Have a wonderful day and take care =)

Stephan

Sina works as a trainer and coach. Last year, she co-founded the Inside Out Movement (Link: http://www.iomovement.org/) in which she puts all her heart and energy at the moment.

In our workshops and coachings, we help people and businesses to create the results they want while staying relaxed and clear-headed. So instead of teaching new tools or complicated techniques, we much rather help our participants to get into the state of mind where they are relaxed and not full of stressful thoughts anymore. From what I have seen and experienced, this is the best headspace to be in when it comes to creating new ideas, making decisions, being productive, or simply to know where you want to go next in life.

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